Thoughts of a Random Nature

Happy March!

I’m 25 years old, and I’ll be 26 in about six months (it’s truly crazy how fast a year goes by!). This puts me smack dab in the middle of my twenties and I must say, when I turned 20 five and a half years ago, I never thought these years would fly by as fast as they have. I can barely remember when it was illegal for me to have a drink. Even my college years, which only ended three years ago, are a little fuzzy. I don’t know if it was I was having so much fun ( I doubt that, for reasons I’ll explain later) or I was undergoing some external and internal changes.

At 20, I was a sophomore in college and still getting used to living semi-independently. While I was enjoying the college atmosphere and having a room all to myself, I was only half-heartedly interested in my academics. As I’ve mentioned before I was studying business, not because it truly held my interest but because I thought it would be the springboard to a good career. Even though I got more enjoyment out of my mandatory English class, I felt stuck in what I was doing. I had a vague idea about going to grad school or even law school but my heart wasn’t set on anything. I saw all my friends pursuing internships and mapping out their futures and I felt like a drifter. In other words, I wasn’t very happy. But I never shared it with anyone. I felt it was a rather trivial problem and I figured most people would just say, “Push through it. The four years will be over before you know it.”

My mental nonchalance extended to my physical appearance. Not that I completely let myself go, but in high school I’d always worn clothes from American Eagle and Aeropostale. Shortly after entering college I started shopping in thrift stores. The clothes were not only cheaper, but I found them to be more unique than anything I could find at the mall. I had shirts in all kinds of prints and even a watermelon colored sweatshirt (it even had black dots lol). Now I think my rather odd fashion sense during this time was a way for me to express myself, since I didn’t feel like I could do it through my studies.

So what am I like now? Well I’m doing this blog and hopefully on my way to becoming a writer. I don’t dress as eccentrically as I used to, even though I don’t regret anything I wore, despite knowing people used to make fun of me behind my back. It felt liberating to wear what I liked, no matter how “unique” it was. My focus now is on looking like a woman in her mid-twenties, and not like a college student (people still say I look like I’m 22!) so my clothes are a little more conservative now. I still like colorful and interesting shirts though.

Mentally, I’m much happier. I’m more secure in myself and what I want. I’m learning how to make my own choices and trust my judgment. I still kind of feel like I’m drifting but I’m not putting a timeline on my career or personal life. I’ve got the rest of my life to figure things out.

How do you think you’ve changed in the past five years?

J

Happy Thursday!

Today I want to talk about an article I ran across. Republican presidential candidate Rick Santorum stated that “the Left” uses college to indoctrinate students. I’m not trying to use this blog to espouse any political beliefs but I found this statement to be utterly ridiculous. I even literally laughed when I read it. Santorum also went on to comment that governments only support colleges because they teach “radical secular ideologies” and argued that if Judeo-Christian philosophies were taught instead all federal dollars would be pulled.  He also advised people to stop donating to colleges due to these institutions indoctrinating “kids” everyday with left-wing beliefs.

It’s difficult for me to even begin with my issues with these statements.  Let me preface by saying I consider myself politically moderate, but probably more left-leaning. As someone who has attended college however, I never felt I was being indoctrinated. I do feel that through the people and ideas I encountered I was forced to examine myself and my beliefs because I was challenged. And I’m glad I was because I wouldn’t be the person today if I never had to think about not only what I thought and felt, but why.

Thinking about all of the professors I had, I would say that most of them seemed fairly liberal. At the same time I never felt they were trying to persuade me into a certain type of thinking. They had their opinion and we were free to disagree and debate with them. But isn’t that what education is about, stretching your mind and being open to new ideas? Santorum also argued that the majority of students who enter college with a faith conviction graduate without it. Whether that’s true I don’t know but it could very well be. College is the time when we question the belief system we’ve grown up with. That’s a huge part of becoming an adult and an independent thinker. Sometimes we agree with what we’ve been brought up to believe and sometimes we don’t. Such is life.

And as far as government not supporting schools that actively promote Judeo-Christian beliefs, Santorum’s right. There’s that little tidbit in the Constitution about separation of church and state. If you don’t want to pay for your children to learn “radical secular ideologies” then don’t. Send them to private institutions instead.

How do you feel about this article? Do you agree or disagree with Santorum’s position?

J

Lately the issues of education and college have been on my mind so I’m going to write about it today. As I’ve mentioned before I have a bachelor’s degree in English. I’m proud of my degree because it represents four years of hard work and studying. I enjoyed the time I spent writing and immersed in literature. Since graduating I’ve become sensitive to the perception of people who have degrees. Obviously there is this idea those who went to college are smarter. More polished. More professional. More open-minded. More everything.

I cannot say how much this idea bothers me. The idea that because one went to school and completed a certain number of classes often has nothing to do with one’s personality or intellect. I’ve had some of the best conversations with people who’ve never stepped foot in a university. Conversely I’ve been around some who are so caught up in their own intellect that they are extremely condescending. Classier and professional? Occasionally this might be true but everyone is capable of foolishness, no matter the letters behind your name.

If I sound prickly and frustrated about this, it’s because I am. I always thought college was to pursue learning on a scholarly level and broaden perspectives. Instead, in our society, college has morphed into nothing but job training. We are strongly advised to pursue business or the hard sciences because that’s a clear-cut path to high-paying jobs. There’s a joke amongst liberal arts majors that we’ll graduate to work at Starbucks and live in a box. I think that speaks volumes as to how low we believe in learning for its intrinsic value.

I hope there is a day when those who possess a degree are not put on a pedestal with regards to their intellect and personality. Honestly most of the knowledge I’ve acquired has been outside the classroom. I think it would also be great if the liberal arts vs. business/hard sciences debate is put to rest and college students would be encouraged to pursue whatever track they find fulfilling and intellectually stimulating.

Why did you pursue your major? Have you ever noticed the stereotypes of college degree holders? What about those of non-degree holders?

J

Happy Thursday!

I had a strange little thought on my mind last night and since this is the place for random thoughts, there’s no better place to say it. Sometimes I think it’s difficult to admit to ourselves how we really feel in some situations. I don’t like speaking for others so I’ll only provide perspective from my experiences.  I’ve had this problem in my life a few times before, where I was not only able to convince others I felt a certain way but myself as well.

I’m an example person so I’ll provide a story. When I was a freshman in college, I declared my major in Business. Business is practical, everyone said. You’ll get a great job, make great money with this major. Despite the fact that I enjoyed my required English class more than Intro to Financial Accounting, I often used the reasoning of a great corporate job (with the $$ to match) following graduation whenever asked why I picked my major. It was safe but deep down I was miserable. I hated going to accounting lectures and they might as well have been teaching the class in Italian because I didn’t understand any of it. I’d read novels for my literature class in one day but struggle through 2 pages of a chapter in my business book.

Fortunately sometime my sophomore year I couldn’t take any more. College was becoming mentally arduous because I was afraid to admit to myself that I really wanted to major in English and be a writer. I no longer cared that people thought I was wasting my money and time pursuing a major that wouldn’t necessarily lead to a high-paying job. Because if I really asked myself, that’s not what I cared about. I admit, I was so worried about fitting in and not disappointing anyone that I fooled myself into thinking I wanted to be a high-powered businesswoman. But why did this happen? Honestly I think it was a fear of stepping out of my comfort zone and defying expectations that had been thrust upon me.

There are other situations in which this feeling creeps up though. Whether it’s admitting deep down you don’t really like a person or even that you’re a tiny bit jealous or envious of someone. It’s basically admitting to yourself maybe you aren’t as nice as you think you are. Or that you’re a little insecure or vulnerable.

Anyway, like I said this was just a thought that crossed my mind and I thought here would  be the perfect place to explore it. So I turn it over to you, have you ever had to do some serious thinking and admit to yourself what was really going on?

J