The Dark Side of the Moon

I”m back! I’ve been meaning to blog for weeks but my priorities have changed a bit. My workload and schedule is different and I’m finding myself having to make a concentrated effort to write. It’ll be a year for this blog in January (yay!) and I’ve debated whether I should end it at the end of the year. I started this blog because I had a lot to say about life after college and the things I (and I’m sure a few others) go through during their mid-20s. And, partially because I have little time on my hands to spare, I started feeling I had run out of good thoughts to blog. But lately I’ve been feeling inspired again so here we go :)

My last post, back in September, I mentioned a new show that I was going to try to check out called underemployed.  One day I ended up watching it….and found myself bored and ready to turn the channel after five minutes. Unfortunately I couldn’t find my remote so I watched the full episode. My issue with the show wasn’t that it was bad, I just really can’t relate anymore. Because this show is in a similar vein to many of my posts this past year (i.e. what do I really want to do with my life?, can I really pursue writing or is it just a folly?) I told myself that if I found the show unrelatable then that would mean I had changed, grown a little. And in a small way my growth has scared me.

I called this post “the dark side of the moon” because it’s a part of the moon that you never see. These past few months I’ve noticed a change in myself that I’ve never seen and never envisioned. I’m starting to enjoy business, an area that I’ve never enjoyed previously. I feel my free-spirited ways giving way to a Type A personality. I haven’t had the time to write in weeks and for the first time, started considering it a silly hobby that I’d probably put away.

The problem that I was dealing with was that who I was becoming was not reconciling with who I wanted to be. I’ve always wanted to be a free-spirit  spending my days writing. But I’m starting to learn that professional growth is not necessarily a bad thing and may be worth embracing. I’m realizing that life is not black and white, one does not have to do or be just one thing. It’s okay to have a professional life and pursue creativity on the side.

Even though I’m not in that stage of being a wet-behind-the-ears college graduate anymore, I’m still finding myself gradually adjusting to being an adult. Not in the physical sense of taking care of myself and going to work everyday, but mentally becoming independent and deciding how I want to spend my time and live my life.

As beautiful as the moon is, I’m willing to look past the moonlight and embrace the dark side ;)

Have  you ever grown or changed in ways you would’ve never imagined? How did that make you feel?

J

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